Category Archives: Crazy Chinese People

The love for Table Tennis

My father-in-law is a pretty normal person if you exclude his cleaning frenzies every single day. He wakes up around 6 in the morning and goes to work from where he returns some when in the late afternoon. In his free time he loves to clean the apartment, play some weird browser games, watching some sports on TV and then its already sleeping time. Basically he is busy the whole day but you are wrong, he squeezes in still his hobby: Table Tennis!

FIL2

His work is not the busiest you might imagine as it leaves him plenty of time to go eating with us (when we are there), buy some groceries and do sports with his colleagues. Usually he plays every day at least one hour table tennis and this already for years. This resulted that he even participated and won the city political bureau championships.

I always imagined my father-in-law as a not so sporty person because, I don’t know, perhaps because most of my friends are doing sports partly even professionally and you can see from their appearance that they do something, not so much FIL. Of course every sport is different and I am used to swimming and the like which shapes the body a bit different. Anyways, last years summer FIL invited us to join his practice. I was more than eager to join as that holiday in China was more about our wedding and not so much about visiting new interesting places in Xi’an.

FIL6
FIL in action

 

As we entered the sports hall several colleagues of FIL greeted us and all of them were playing some matches. FIL was wearing already his sports clothes so he started his warm up and putting on his knee protectors (he is not the youngest anymore). Meanwhile I checked how the others were playing and it looked to me already pretty good but then FIL’s first match started. Lets just say that I could not even follow the ball. Sure, it was no World Championships level but I had never seen anything like it before and I had actually watched once in my youth the Staten Championships in Germany. I don’t know how to describe it other than that the usually so slowly paced FIL transformed into an agile table tennis playing machine.

Already by watching him I started to sweat (might be also because it was too hot in that hall!) but he barely got out of breath in three matches. After he was done he asked me if I wanted to play a quick round of table tennis. The stupid me thought of course that he might be exhausted despite the fact that he was not out of breath and not sweating. I lost, I lost terribly. He made me run non-stop and I barely got any points on him. After 15 min I was lying on the ground, out of breath and created a little lake of sweat around me. How embarrassing but at least it seemed I was able to bond a bit with FIL even though I must have looked like the worst table tennis player in history.

FIL5
The strawberries seem to pull him down!

 

Latest from this experience I learned not ever to judge someone by their appearance!

 

The Good and the Disturbing

Today is the continuation of last weeks article. Back then something good and something bad happened. First of all the good thing was that I got a job and the bad thing was that the stupid Internet technician failed to arrive and thus delaying our moving date.

What else should I write about today other than the internet technician. This nice man finally managed to arrive yesterday to set up our internet connection and with it we should be able to move in Soon™. What we did not think about when it comes to our internet connection is that all around the phone line is not a single power outlet for the wi-fi router! Just who designs such things? Really, something like that is driving me crazy and forces me to doWP_20141119_13_52_57_Pro[1] stupid things like drilling a hole into a wall to pull a cable through just to realize when I am nearly through the wall that there is a metal support and the drill won’t go any further…indeed, now we have an ugly hole in the wall which is leading into nowhere.

As you can see I have some mixed feelings when it comes to my families internet luck but yesterday something good happened as well as I signed the job contract. However there is a little issue as every time someone asks me what I do in my job the stabdard answer is ‘I don’t know’. I really have no clue at all what I will do and furthermore the job title is not helping me any further as I am supposedly in the sales management even though I do nothing sales related, crazy & weird world.

WP_20141119_13_53_07_Pro[1]
Off Topic: My wife assembled this little chairs

Missing the Crazy Chinese Family part in the article? Do not fear as my mother-in-law is so gracious in providing once again some odd and disturbing things. The odd part is about our TV. I fulfilled my dream and bought a nice 55″ TV which I got for nearly half price (I just search and search and search some more for products I am interested in until I find a real bargain). It is even not too big for a living room as we have plenty of space with about 3.5m between sofa and TV, it actually appears to be perhaps too small…BUT there is MIL. Of course my wife showed via Weixin/ WeChat our living room and MIL got a glimpse on that TV. ‘Too big’, ‘No good for you and ‘It is too close to your sofa, your eyes will get bad’. Normally those would be reasonable concerns but in this case they are so, how to say it, so MIL. My in-laws have a 65″ TV hanging about 1.50m away from their sofa but that seems fine. Apparently MIL didn’t notice this until her daughter mentioned what monstrosity they have hanging on their own wall. What is MIL’s reaction to this? Of course, its FIL’s fault! Whenever something bad happens or something which might look bad on her it is always her husbands fault, even when he is not anywhere close by or even knows what is going on.

You just want to hear the disturbing thing, I know it. Well the thing is that MIL is kind of threatening us. Okay, not threatening us in a way you might imagine but it is dangerous enough for me. She is probably coming next year again to visit us but she does not want to eating8take her husband with, no no, she wants to take her mother with. Grandma might be a nice old lady but her with MIL combined is an explosive mixture, not to mention when my wife is coming into the battlefield. When those three are together it will be war and that war would be in our new apartment, no thanks. I just have to figure out how to escape this life threatening situation when those two people really do come to Germany to visit us! Perhaps I should just go to China and visit father-in-law, nothing crazy there at least except the cleaning.

p.s. Changed some parts as the TV’s were too huge with 55 and 65 feet. Hope it is correct now :p

Dancing Mother-In-Law

It has been already all over the news in the past years in China: The Dancing Granny Problem. Apparently there are more and more people doing their dancing routines during evening hours in Chinese cities and at the same time cause an annoyance for residents in those areas.The majority of these people is from my experience somewhere between 40 and 70 years and female. So it is no wonder that my dear mother-in-law belongs to this group of people.

WeChatImage635499295030855846
MIL’s Dancing Group

My mother-in-law retired from her modeling career some 15 odd years ago and had ever since then too much time on her hands. Her favorite activities are shopping and sleeping as already mentioned here. However she has another hobby and I believe you guessed it already from the title of this article!

 

She started with dancing some short time after her retirement in some real classes. After few years she started one of the infamous Dancing Grannies groups and terrorizes Xi’ans city center ever since then on a daily basis. However there is one main difference which sets her group apart from most other groups: Real complicated folk dances.

MILDance

 

You see, most of the groups are dancing to overly load music each evening and only use a very limited set of different moves/ steps. Through this anybody can learn the dance in no time and join the ever-growing dancing movement. With MIL’s group it is a bit different. Her group is much smaller and consists of perhaps 20-30 people and to learn even one dance can take up a whole month. Each evening they meet for at least 90 min and first revise some old dances they had already learned and then start with new dance step by step. And don’t be mistaken because with step by step I really mean it. There are barely any repetitions in these dances so each part has to be learned bit by bit. I have been watching these dancing practices already for some time and I am just amazed how these elderly women (and few men) can remember these different dances as they are in my opinion pretty complicated.

 

WeChatImage635499294954029948But there is one thing which is just to typical of my MIL and I just have to share this. Every time when we come over to watch her dance she usually just sits around with some friends, chats and eats snacks. Now, as soon as she sees us she of course greets us in a way that you expect we had been away for the past decade or so and then she gets in front of her group for the next dancing steps and shows how to do them properly. You might think it is just coincidence that she starts teaching the others when we arrive, perhaps she has some set timetable or similar, but no. We have watched sometimes the group from around the corner before we arrive and it is every single time the same thing: She just sits around, jokes with her friends while the rest of the group is trying to learn the new moves. Usually she is still dancing when we leave but as soon as we are around the corner it is again the same thing, she goes back to her friends to do basically nothing. I know I know, I am just too picky with my MIL’s behavior but it is just so like her, trying to show off or appear to be a very busy person.

 

Even though it appears that she is resting most of the time she is actually rather good when it comes to dancing. Her group participates sometimes in a few dancing events and she is usually the lead dancer. Not bad for a woman who views shopping and sleeping as her main activities in life.

 

Before I forget it, MIL is the only one of her Dancing Group who is wearing the dress properly resulting in that the stomach is showing as all others pull up their skirts more because they think that they will look shorter when they tummy is visible…what troubles those poor people have.