Category Archives: Crazy Chinese People

MIL’s multifunctional kitchen rag

I think the title is already giving you all the .needed information. Today I will focus on my crazy Chinese mother-in-law’s favorite kitchen rag. This kitchen rag is so great that she uses it for nearly everything. Where “normal” people use a kitchen rag to do some basic drying of their kitchen stuff or to clean few things. Of course these things MIL is doing as well with her kitchen rag but it can do so much more:

  • cleaning apples
  • cleaning the cooking platform
  • cleaning the floor
  • covering any dough for rising
  • drying her hands
  • cleaning and drying the sink
  • cleaning the frying pan
  • cleaning the frying machine
  • and and and

I wouldn’t be surprised to find out more uses of this great multifunctional kitchen rag. And do you know the best thing about this rag? Apparently it does not require any washing! You know, ever since I realized she is doing this all with one kitchen rag I do not feel particularly hungry anymore when she is cooking…

Right now the kitchen developes more and more into a battle zone

WP_20150513_11_46_12_Pro
How the rag looks now
WP_20150513_11_32_20_Pro
When it was still new a month ago…

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do you have also a multifunctional kitchen rag or do you know somebody doing this very insane thing?

Be sure to follow me also on Facebook and on Twitter as I will post there occasionally pictures which do not find their way into my blog posts.

https://www.facebook.com/CrazyChineseFamily

https://twitter.com/CraChineseFam

Our Crazy Chinese Photoshoot

Yes, we had also one of these photo shootings in China. Ours happened in 2011 during my first trip to China and I must say it was a very interesting experience. Not that it was such a  terrible day but neither was it such a wonder for us two to have it anytime soon again.

Import_152

It all started several months before our trip to China as suddenly my back then to be mother-in-law wanted us to have such photoshoot.  I wasn’t so against it at first until my wife told me how exhausting it will be and that we will have several trips to the office of this company in order to select clothes, surroundings, how many pictures we want, what frames and and and. I think you get an idea now what a hassle such photoshoot is. It gets actually even worse, when we finally arrived in Xi’an MIL took us the next week everyday to visit different photo shooting companies around the city to find the one offering us the best deal.

After one exhausting week of going around the city both MIL and my wife settled in the end for one company. After seeing so many of those companies with their sample pictures I could not even tell anymore any difference because, and I swear, all those sample pictures had the same models and themes so it all looked the same to me. I guess they just copy pasted them from some Korean company as all of them had some Korean text in the pictures. Sadly I do not have any example right now but the Chinglish they put in some of the photo albums is just hilarious.  The company we used gave us no weird Chinglish in the album however some rather unfitting English descriptions of the pictures. For example one picture in which we are standing out on a green field next to a tree it say “Narrow Alley in Chengdu”, alright Chengdu must be damn huge if that open field is a narrow alley!

Import_097

On our first journey to the office we decided on the themes we wanted, an about idea for the clothes, the price, how many pictures we want and other smaller details. The second visit few days later was for chosing the dresses for my wife. This took perhaps only two hours so it wasn’t that bad. Sure, those clothes were not the cleanest around but what you expect after hundreds of people have been wearing those before and for that price…then came the third visit which was also the photoshoot day. We had to be there at 7am to get ourselves ready. This meant even for me makeup! Whaaat makeup for me? They did something with my face for roughly 30 min and then I was apparently ready. However I did not dare to check the mirror in fear what I might see. The whole makeup session for my wife was a bit longer, about one hours of something hapenning, I really did not comprehend what they did but in the end I was able to see that  something had happened. Now the bad part is coming, chosing the clothes for me. You see, they had to find me the extra extra large ones so they fit on my shoulder and then fit them around my waist with tons of pins  as it was too big there. It was rather depressing and after this I also realized that I will probably never find suitable clothes for myself in China (and I have not find anything there to this day).

After all this madness we set out with a company van to drive to the countryside around Xi’an with the mountain range in the background. That day was of course once again terrible hot but we had at least blue sky, a real rarity during all my trips to China. During the outdoor photoshoot we had to change clothes a couple of times, do our wonderful fake smiles, fix makeup nonstop as the heat was melting everything but after half day we were finally able to go back to the city. Pretty much everyone fell asleep on the trip back except me as the seats were a bit too small in that van so I lost feeling in my legs within mintues of sitting there.

Import_079

No, we were not done yet with the picture madness. We still had two sets to go through. One was inside the studio with all kind of weird backgrounds and one was on the roof of the studio with some fake wooden structures. They even gave me a guitar to hold for a few pictures however this guitar wasn’t in the best shape anymore as it had only few strings loosely hanging and a hole in the side, someone must have really not liked this guitar. But after those seemingly neverending sets we were done for the day. After over 12 hours we were able to go back home. Some days later we went back there to select the pictures we liked/ MIL and my wife were selecting, I just sat around, out of the thousands they had taken and which ones should be further edited. I really like those edited pictures as first time since my childhood I have white teeth again!

After all this trouble I was just happy that this all is over. I really hope that I never have to go through this again as I am clearly not build for such horrors. However I am fearing that during our next trip MIL will have this great idea to get a photoshoot together with Nathan…

 

Did you go through a Chinese photoshoot madness as well? Do you perhaps know what is the thing with all the Korean in those photo shooting companies?

Be sure to follow me also on Facebook and on Twitter as I will post there occasionally pictures which do not find their way into my blog posts.

https://www.facebook.com/CrazyChineseFamily

https://twitter.com/CraChineseFam

She is Back!

Guess who’s back,back again, MIL is back, tell a friend, Guess who’s back, guess who’s back, guess who’s back, guess who’s back…

With a little tweaking these lyrics by Eminem are fitting just too well with the current situation. Thursday evening my dear mother-in-law arrived at Hamburg Airport. Actually I could already stop writing at this point as all evils have been already told for an entire week. It is rather strange to have my first blog post after my two weeks absence from blogging only about MIL but it seems like fate.

 

MILback3
Why are we waiting here again?

Now she has been with us already for a few days and enough has happened to fill several blog posts. On the day we picked her up from the airport nothing extraordinary happened. No horror messages came from Finland where she had to take her connecting flight to Germany. Actually I had hoped something like last year would repeat itself again but luck doesn’t seem to be my strong point right now. So once we arrived at the arrival hall I could pinpoint MIL immediately even though I saw her only for a few seconds at the luggage claim  before the doors closed again. In this moment I realized that these will be very long three months for us!

 

MIL wouldn’t be MIL without her doing something just plain crazy. Of course she saw us as well few minutes later  (she must have senses like a bat) and came running towards us. Yes, she ran out of the luggage claim before getting her luggage. There is a reason why the doors only open from one side so people do not enter the luggage claim who have nothing to do there. After my wife finally got a tiny bit of sense into MIL’s brain this wonderful woman tried to get back into the luggage claim. Of course it didn’t work right in the beginning and only after some other people came out she was able to return. There is always security close by so this won’t happen and then I saw two security guards looking at MIL and then at me. To avoid any more disaster I gave them the “crazy sign” for MIL so they just smiled at me and let her return.

 

MILback2
Do you try to bribe me?

One would think that she learned a bit from this however few minutes later she came sprinting back towards us to cuddle Nathan. This step she repeated several times and in between she talked with other Chinese pointing at us. Thankfully she got her luggage relatively quick so after twenty minutes this endeavour ended and we could start our journey back home together with MIL. Of course she wanted to hold Nathan all the time in the car and not putting him into the safety seat. Somehow she does not understand the purpose of safety seats and seatbelts as it took her over half hour and constant reminding by my wife to buckle up…

 

What else happened thus far with her? Oh, just minor things but just too many to list them all so I give just a brief overview of the things which stick out the most of the everyday madness. Lets start with MIL trying to give Nathan always nearly boiling water to drink. No matter how often my wife says that this is too hot she just smiles and says it is not hot for her so it is okay for Nathan. Then there is the thing of her somehow not being able to close the windows. Instead of locking them when closing the windows she just close them without locking. Hence every time there is some wind they are pushed open again.

 

MILback4
Why I have to sit here?

Then there is something else entirely. As soon as she arrived in our apartment she made plans on how to “improve” our living room. Quickly she made plans to move the whole TV set to another position, move the aquarium to another corner etc. What she still did not understand yet is that we need some more people than just us to do so. Part of the TV set is hanging on the wall, it took three men installing this and furthermore once you remove it you will have big holes in the wall. Then there is the aquarium…even though it is not big the total weight amounts to over 200 kg right now, sure lets just push it to the other corner. The list goes on and on but I guess you got the idea.

 

Not all is bad with my Chinese mother-in-law being here as she is also a great help for my wife now. As we are planing to start a little side business my wife needs to prepare a lot for it and does not really have time to help me with the cleaning or prepare food for us. Here MIL comes in as she does all the cooking now (seems she improved in the past year, thank god!) and actually does more cleaning right now than messing it up again with her oily handprints.

 

How do you deal with your in-laws? What’s the longest time period you stayed with them?

Be sure to follow me also on Facebook and on Twitter as I will post there occasionally pictures which do not find their way into my blog posts.

https://www.facebook.com/CrazyChineseFamily

https://twitter.com/CraChineseFam