What Winter?

Currently it seems winter has arrived everywhere in the world. New York is basically drowning in snow, Scandinavia had for the past weeks more than enough of this devilish snow with temperatures dropping down to -40 degrees Celsius, heck even Chongqing is covered in this white mess. It seems everywhere it is snowing except my dear hometown. I am usually the last person to complain about lack of snow during winter time as I had my share of battles in Finland à la digging out the car each morning/ actually finding the car. However ever since we moved to Germany winter has been very mild in this area.

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Grumpy Nathan on December the 24th, what a winter

Northern Germany, especially the state of Schleswig-Holstein where we live, is rarely hunted down by icy winters with tons of snow. The last time there had been much snow here was during the so-called “Snow Catastrophe of 1978” when even in my hometown snow drifts could reach a height of up to 3m! The reason for such mild winters is the fact that this state is located between the North Sea and the Baltic Sea. We had each winter some snow, nothing special but usually enough to go to the nearby sledging hill and have some fun or to build snowmen and castles. When my wife visited Germany for the first time in 2010 we had snow. In fact each time we went to visit my parents during winter time we had snow here. However now  we live here and the most I have seen is a layer of perhaps an inch of snow which melted away the very same day.

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Winter of 2010, see we had snow before Nathan was born!

No snow is not a bad thing for me except that we would love to show Nathan what all he could do outside during winter time. Thus far all he could do this winter is wearing his rainboots and jump into puddles. The weird thing is that when Nathan was born we also lacked snow in Finland! We had a thick layer up till a week before he was born and then suddenly poof it’s gone! That week before he was born was the last time I needed any winter clothes or to dig out my car. I have the strange feeling that Nathan is creating an invisible dome around us which does not let any snow in. Afterall I think he even hates snow from what I can tell about his encounters with the pathetic one inch layers of snow in the past two years. Each time he sees snow on the ground he retreats, points with his hand to the snow as says “eew”.

 

Do you have snow where you live?

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First Contact

Last autumn we visited China for the first time together with Nathan. I stayed only for a few days however Nathan and his mother haunted Xi’an for nearly a whole month. During that time Nathan made his first contact with the other members of the Crazy Chinese Family.

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Aunty and little little sister

For me as a grown up it was already much to get used to when I met them for the first time several years ago. Not that they are as crazy as my mother-in-law but they still are related to her so what can you expect! There is Granny who spawned crazy MIL and seems more often than not to be even more stubborn than her daughter, there is Aunty who always does everything wrong according to MIL,  there is Uncle who lives with his family together with Granny, my wife’s little sister (cousin, daughter of aunty) who is still trying to find some rich guy but in Japan (but he shouldn’t be Japanese of course), and the little little sister (youngest cousin of my wife, daughter of uncle) who needs two hours to eat a soup but can finish a burger in seconds. Alright,nothing really crazy about this all but imagine them all bunched up in one room with their whole attention on little Nathan. Yep, all attention on that tiny little Nathan who just wants to run away from them all.

 

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Make them go away Mommy!

I guess you can imagine how Nathan reacted when seeing them all, crying and trying to get as far away as possible from them/ into mommy’s arms. Of course they all mean no harm but when all of them try to squeeze and feed him snacks at the same time it just can be too much for such a little human being. I mean I could barely survive each encounter when we went eating with the family and every person just piles up more food on my plate. I have the strong believe that they tried to create a new Jabba the Hutt out of me. Nathan is usually the kind of baby who is too trusting and not afraid of strangers at all but with his own Chinese family he turned into a crying mess.

Though all craziness poured into him in one go he managed to survive. He even calmed down and played with the crazy Chinese relatives but this was only achieved with a lot of bribing via fruits and snacks. Guess how many people it takes to get in China a baby to sleep? Nearly the whole family!! I am not joking but it seems that every female of the family has to be present when trying to get Nathan to sleep. As they all are pretty noisy when being together it takes a long time for him to fall asleep, long enough that they get hungry and need to make some food in between…but that is again a story for another time.

The first contact with his Chinese Family went rather well despite him being afraid like hell in the beginning. I wonder how it will turn out next time when going to China. I have no idea yet when there will be a next trip but I hope it will be soon and that I will be there as well. Not because I am so eager to meet the family once again but the food, the food!

Do you have people on the family with the ability to scare children away?

Be sure to follow me also on Facebook and on Twitter as I will post there occasionally pictures which do not find their way into my blog posts. Furthermore I also have a YouTube Channel in which some videos might pop up from time to time

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https://twitter.com/CraChineseFam

https://www.youtube.com/

 

Crazy Chinese Family Trees

It is time for the first guest post on my blog in 2016. This guest post by Learn Mandarin Now gives interesting facts about Chinese Family Trees and how to address family members the proper way without embarrassing yourself too much. It is not the first guest post you Learn Mandarin Now on my blog and you might remember for example Three Ways To Learn Mandarin Chinese Effectively or the Infographic about the Top 10 Ways to Learn Mandarin Chinese.

 

I don’t know about you, but I am a long-time follower of Timo’s blog: Crazy Chinese Family. I enjoy it the most when Timo writes about his “interesting” relationship with his mother-in law, which makes me laugh every time!

I know Timo can speak some Mandarin Chinese and, despite this and having first-hand experience about how Chinese-in laws and families can be, it’s probably still hard for him to sometimes understand just how crazy and complicated Chinese family trees can be. In fact, at times, it’s hard to get family relationships all right, even for native Chinese!

Well, if you also feel this way too, we hope we can help you out today!

 

In my opinion, the Chinese family tree is complicated for couple of key reasons:

  • for example, for the English word “cousin” there are eight Chinese word: 表(biǎo)哥(gē),表(biǎo)姐(jiě),表(biǎo)弟(dì),表(biǎo)妹(mèi),堂(táng)哥(gē),堂(táng)姐(jiě),堂(táng)弟(dì),堂(táng)妹(mèi)。Crazy?
  • as we all know, China is a really big country and, although the aim is to have a standard language for students to learn or remember, there are lots of variations for the same terms. The Chinese word “媳(xí)妇(fù)” means daughter-in law but, in some areas, it can also mean wife… again so crazy!

 

A Chinese family tree can be talked about forever, but let’s get started with the basics:

A couple: this is easy:

Husband: 老(lǎo)公(gōng),丈(zhàng)夫(fu),先(xiān)生(shēng)

Wife: 老(lǎo)婆(pó),妻(qī)子(zi),夫(fū)人(rén)

In-laws (here’s a more complicated part)

If you are like Timo and married to a Chinese lady, you should call your wife’s parents:

wife’s father: 岳(yuè)父(fù)

wife’s mother: 岳(yuè)母(mǔ)

 

But what they should call Timo?

婿(xù)。

Note: 女(nǚ)婿(xù)is the most proper word to use. It’s used more to introduce you to someone. Eg. This is my son in-law. 是(shì)我(wǒ)的(de)女(nǚ)婿(xù)。

In most cases, your in-laws will just say your formal name or your Chinese name (if you have one).

What if your wife has lots of brothers/sisters?

Your wife’s older brother: 大舅子(dàjiùzi)

older sister: 大姨子(dàyízi)

younger brother: 小舅子(xiǎojiùzǐ)

younger sister: 小(xiǎo)姨(yí)子(zǐ)

Seems a bit complicated, right? Well, I don’t want to go any deeper into this today, but really I understand how confused you may feel.

 

Still, as Chinese New Year is coming soon, if you also are meeting family-in law and family, here are two great tips for you:

  • The number one rule is NEVER call seniors by their name directly. For example, your (future) mother-in-law is 陈大矛(I just made her name up). Don’t call her 陈大矛or 大矛,both are big No-no’s, unless you don’t want to see her again ever… However, when speaking to the younger generation, calling them by their names is acceptable.
  • The second tip is if your Chinese is only at beginner level and you don’t remember the names of relatives at all, just ask before you speak to anyone to avoid making any silly mistakes. Typically, as you might be one of only one of the few foreigners in the room, a friend or colleague or your Chinese family will usually be happy to help you out.

 

Finally, as a long time follower of Timo, I am always on Timo’s side and hope in the New Year he can win the “war” with his mother in-law. With that thought, I want to offer Timo’s some Chinese wisdom from the “art of the war” in the New Year. 己(jǐ)知(zhī)彼(bǐ),百(bǎi)战(zhàn)不(bú)殆(dài)。

Weekly Chinese Wisdom_01

 

Anyway, I am just joking. Of course, Timo loves his in-laws and his Chinese family 🙂

 

Either way, if you are also interested in learning more about Mandarin Chinese, we recently launched our very interesting, daily Chinese Podcasts from Monday to Friday on our site. You can either listen directly on our site Learn Mandarin Now or via different platforms such as iTunes. Feel free to leave your honest feedback or rating to us, we always appreciate hearing from you.

I wish everyone an amazing 2016 and Spring Festival ahead.

 

Did you ever face the problem of addressing family members the proper way?

Be sure to follow me also on Facebook and on Twitter as I will post there occasionally pictures which do not find their way into my blog posts. Furthermore I also have a YouTube Channel in which some videos might pop up from time to time

https://www.facebook.com/CrazyChineseFamily

https://twitter.com/CraChineseFam

https://www.youtube.com/

 

 

 

My crazy Chinese Family I married into…